Mothers of boys have a secret code. It’s a raised eyebrow, a knowing glance and a resigned slump of the shoulders. A cheerful smile at the end of a long day, when the tiny terrors, who have been wreaking havoc from dawn, smother their maternal figure in kisses and cuddles. It’s about being covered in snot, paint and other unknown (and unidentifiable) substances. It’s about seeing other mothers deal with the epic-ness that is male children and offering a silent salute.
If you’re a mother of boys then you know the drill. If you’re about to be… well… hold onto your pregnancy pillow. You’re in for a bumpy ride.
Raising Boys – The Reality
Being the mother of boys is not dissimilar to being the mother of dragons. You’re surrounded by chaos, there’s always someone vying for your attention and you’re well practiced in the fine art of the stern stare. Your only saving grace is that these little guys can’t breathe fire, but they’re still well capable of burning the house down.
Imagine a pinball machine in an arcade. The constant pinging around, the flashing lights, the furiously moving pieces. Now imagine that you’re trapped inside the pinball machine and you can’t get out. It’s thrilling, the music’s catchy, but there’s always that sneaking suspicion that someone’s just about to get a good, hard bonk on the head.
Welcome to raising boys. It’s not quite dragons or video game arcades, but it’s a lot of fun!
Things You’ve Never Been Told
Here’s a list of handy hints for mothers-of-boys-to-be that no one ever told you.
-
Your handbag is now not your handbag. It is now home to a million pairs of underpants, five Matchbox cars, two half-eaten sandwiches and a number of mysterious liquids.
-
You now view all parks and playgrounds as an accident waiting to happen – and you scan, Predator-style, for obstacles that will crack open tiny skulls.
-
You have lost all sense of embarrassment when it comes to shouting at the top of your lungs in public.
-
You have accepted that your toilet will never, ever, ever be the same.
-
You have more love in your heart than you thought possible.
Being a mother of boys is an adventure. Sure, you might not know where you’re going and the driver might be slightly maniacal, but you’re sure as heck going to have fun!
